There is a lull that lasts between the day after Christmas and New Years Day. It’s calm, quiet, and not a whole lot of expectation (hello, sweatpants) – which is kinda nice after the busyness of the holidays. Occasionally, I’ll make a New Years resolution during that time, when I really have time to just sit and think and be quiet for a while. My biggest resolution that I actually followed through on (or at least that is significant enough to note) was last year. I made a promise to myself that I would start journaling as a way to help express my emotions and feelings vs. just bottling them up. I was struggling with keeping everything tucked inside, knowing I had much to share. I’m quite an introvert, believe it or not, so opening up and sharing isn’t something I easily do in person.
Last January, I did start journaling. I wrote two entires. HA! But I got frustrated with writing pen to paper because my brain worked faster than my hands could write. I realized I needed a more effective and efficient way to write, delete and revise what I wanted to say.
After much debating with God, I reluctantly accepted that the journaling He had placed on my heart was a little bit bigger than the tiny pink notebook I had picked up from Hobby Lobby, which intended to keep to myself. He wanted me to blog…for all the internet world to read…*eek!*…and so here we are!
Last year gave me a boost of confidence that I really can set out to accomplish what I want, and become a better version of myself. So, this year, I have a few resolutions. Most of my resolutions are focused around inner strength (daily gratitude, happiness, being present). However, I have one big goal that’s going to take both that inner strength and a lot of discipline. And that is to publish on the blog more frequently. I’ve committed to carving out an hour each week to write. Unfortunately, that’s probably going to mean early mornings or late nights for me, as my schedule is dictated by the three tiny “assistants” who I’m blessed to have call me “Mom”. But, I know the freedom I feel and the joy that fills my heart after each post is published is something that I long to have more of. I need to stop resisting – stop making excuses, and simply make my goal a priority.
So, today, while the rest of my family enjoys a warm winter’s nap – I’m here…listening to the hum of the space heater and the rhythmic clicking on the keyboard, and wishing I hadn’t let my hot chocolate become lukewarm because now it tastes disgusting, holding myself accountable. In reflecting, it’s become clear, that Day One of 2019 was filled with many blessings:
*Attending Mass solo-mio (that’s right, no hubby, no kids, aka-mini vaca) and I was determined to have the best time. Then reality hit; I got surrounded by people coughing, sneezing, and blowing their noses. And worse of all, the one person who probably ate too much cheese and crackers last night and kept me captured in an inescapable fart cloud …
But, I noticed how my spiritual life has grown. Because those things that would have once distracted me and pulled my joy from Mass (which is what the devil wants), I was able to take those former distractions, turn them into prayer, and really treasure my hour listening, singing, and praying.
*When I got home, Claire came up, gave me a hug and said “I wuh yew.” Unprompted. That’s enough to make my whole year, right there. Gosh, that girl knows how to melt my heart.
*I made the time for myself to sit and write. No distractions. No excuses.
What are some of your resolutions for this year? Leave them in the comments below!
May this new year bring to you and your family an abundance of beautiful memories, happiness, and joy that surpasses all understanding. Happy 2019 from our home to yours!